The Return Page 11

  And Jacob loved her enough to do what it took to prove this truth to her.

  “Okay,” he said at last. His voice was hoarse, too thick, but at least the words were clear and even. “I understand. I’ll do it. We’ll give ourselves a month or so to get some distance and be sure that what we want is each other.”

  She nodded, tears streaming down her face. “I think it’s a good idea.”

  Rationally, he could see that it was indeed a good idea, but the rational part of his mind was drowned out by the howling outrage of his heart. Being away from Ria for that long could never be good.

  What he said was, “Then that’s what we’ll do. I’ll get Fitz to help with the work on the house and hopefully have enough of it done to head back to Alaska after the weekend.”

  She reached up to caress his cheek with her fingertips. “Thank you, Jacob.”

  “You don’t have to thank me. I’ll do anything in the world to make you feel safe and secure. To make you happy. If this is what it takes, then it’s the least I can do.”

  ON MONDAY MORNING, Ria was trying not to cry when Jacob stopped by the flower shop on his way out of town. He needed to drive to Norfolk, and then his flight would take off around lunchtime.

  He’d been okay for the past few days. Subdued and busy and tired, but he hadn’t pulled back on her. He hadn’t run away.

  She knew he didn’t want to do this. That he was doing it only for her. But it was the only thing she’d been able to come up with that made her feel safe, so she knew it was the right decision.

  She didn’t want Jacob trapped in a life he didn’t really want just because he was carried away by feelings—any more than she wanted to be trapped in a relationship she couldn’t be completely certain of.

  This would give them both the time they needed to come to real decisions.

  Life was so much more—deeper, harder, more complicated—than a wave of feeling that swept you away.

  They hugged for a couple of minutes, standing together in the back room of the shop, their arms around each other. Then Jacob finally pulled back and kissed her gently. “I love you, Ria. A month apart isn’t going to change that.”

  She wanted to believe him, but she wasn’t absolutely sure. It would hurt him if she tried to argue, so she didn’t. “I’ll be here when you’re back. And you need to promise to tell me the truth, no matter what it is. If you change your mind, promise you’ll tell me.”

  He stared at her, achingly poignant. “I promise I’ll tell you the truth. And if I come back and you decide that I’m not what you want, that you’ll never be able to trust me enough to make a relationship work, then I promise I’ll accept it.”

  “Thank you.” She stretched up to kiss him again, stroking his face with both hands for a few seconds, her fingers lingering on his long white scar. “Be safe. I know it’s a dangerous... dangerous job, so please be careful.” She dropped her hands and took a step back.

  Jacob looked like he would reach for her again, but he resisted the impulse. His shoulders were stiff. His eyes were downcast. He murmured, “Goodbye, sweetheart.”

  “Goodbye.”

  She was about to break down, so she was relieved that Jacob didn’t extend the conversation any longer.

  Madeline and Skye found her in the back room a few minutes later, and they stayed with her until she finally stopped crying.

  Ten

  THE MONTH PASSED LONG and slow.

  For most of the time he was out on the fishing boat, Jacob was out of contact. There wasn’t any cell coverage out on the water, and while the boat could radio back to shore, actual phone calls were few and far between.

  He had someone on shore touch base with her every few days with a quick email to confirm that he was still okay—a gesture she really appreciated—but she only talked to him once during the month, and that was only a brief, stilted conversation because the connection kept cutting out.

  Most of the time, Ria tried to focus on work. Spend time with her friends. Madeline’s relationship was getting bumpy—she and Josh were having arguments, something they’d never really had before. And Skye had joined a dating app and was trying to date (without much success). Everyone in town asked her about Jacob in every conversation, as if they still assumed that the two of them were a done deal, despite the time and distance between them.

  It never occurred to any of them that Jacob might not come back home after his fishing run was over.

  It was a Friday afternoon, just over a month after Jacob had left, and Ria was trying not to wonder whether his trip was almost done. They’d just had a big order come in—from a minor movie star who’d heard about them on social media—so she needed to give the arrangement her full attention.

  If they did a good job with this order, it could give them another wave of great publicity.

  At the moment, that was far more important than whether Jacob was still going to love her and want a life with her when he finished his job.

  “Hey,” Madeline said, coming into the back room with a torn piece of notebook paper. She always wrote out the drafts of her poems and messages longhand. “I’ve got something. Tell me if it’s as good as I think it is.”

  Ria put down the pink rose she was about to place in the arrangement and took the piece of paper. She snickered on the second line and then kept giggling through the next several. But her laughing stopped at the end. She put a hand on her throat as she finished reading the poem.

  “That’s beautiful,” she said, her voice cracking embarrassing. “It’s amazing. You are brilliant.”

  “Are you seriously crying at the little poem?”

  Ria sniffed. “No, I’m not crying. But it is a good poem.” She swiped a stray tear away.

  Madeline laughed and put a loose arm around her in a short squeeze. “You’re just emotional lately. For obvious reasons. No word from Jacob yet?”

  “Not yet. I guess he’s not done yet. He said there was never a firm date about the return, so it might last longer than we’re thinking.”

  “Yeah. I’m sure he’ll call you just as soon as he can.”

  “Yeah. I hope so.”

  Madeline frowned. “You’re really worried, aren’t you?”

  “Of course I am. Those fishing boats up there are really danger—”

  “I know that. But that’s not what I mean. You’re really worried that he’s going to change his mind. That he’s not going to want to come back to you.”

  Ria swallowed and turned back to her flowers. “I don’t know.”

  “It’s never going to happen. Jacob was a boy before, and he made a huge mistake. But he loves you more than I’ve ever seen any man...” Madeline shook her head. “He’s not going to change his mind. He loves you so much, Ria. I can only imagine what it would feel like for a man to love you that way.”

  Ria stiffened, immediately distracted by the note in Madeline’s voice. “Josh loves y—”

  Madeline faced her. “I guess. I mean, I think he loves me as much as he’s able to...” She shook her head. “But he doesn’t love me like Jacob loves you. I could see it so clearly when I saw the two of you together last month. And when he left... because you needed him to, even though it was the last thing in the world he wanted to do... Josh would never do something that hard for me. I really don’t think he has it in him.”

  Ria’s heart was fluttering wildly at what Madeline was saying about Jacob, but she was also genuinely concerned about her friend. “If that’s true, Madeline, if that’s really how you feel, then why...?”

  “Because I’ve spent nine years on the man!” Madeline wasn’t a crier—not like Ria and Skye were—but her face contorted for a moment as she breathed raspily. “If I give up on him now... all those years, so much of my life, will be a waste.”

  Ria hugged her friend with a sympathetic whimper. “They won’t have been a waste. You lived your life in those years. Look at everything you accomplished in that time. The relationship was just a small part of tho
se years. And you don’t want to waste any more time on him, if you know he’s not going to make you happy.”

  Madeline pulled away, her face composed in its typical way now. “I know. I need to. It just seems so... It’s going to be so hard and messy. And everyone in town loves him. They’ll think I’m a terrible person for...” She shook her head fiercely. “But I need to do it. I thought I loved him, and part of me probably always will, but it’s not the way I thought it was. And I know for damn sure he doesn’t love me the way I... I deserve.”

  “Exactly. You deserve someone who loves you like...”

  “Like Jacob loves you.”

  Ria swallowed hard. “I hope so. Part of me really believes he does, but then I keep wondering if that’s a silly, romantic part. Not the realistic part. It happened really quickly before. That might not be enough of a foundation for...”

  “Stop being ridiculous. You’ve known him all your life. You were as close as any two people I’ve ever known. It all came back really quickly, but you weren’t starting from nothing. You already had the foundation. You just need to trust that it’s real.”

  “If he comes back and... and still wants what he wanted before, then I think I’ll believe him.”

  “And he’s still what you want?” Madeline was looking at her sharply now.

  Ria gave a bittersweet smile. “He’s always been what I wanted. I’m very sorry to have to admit it, but Azalea was right about me all along.”

  LATER THAT AFTERNOON, Jacob parked his rental car in front of his grandfather’s old house, grabbed his bag, and headed inside.

  No one in town was expecting him. He’d gotten back to shore two days ago and had immediately started packing up his stuff, saying goodbye to folks he knew up in Alaska, and arranging his flight back down to Virginia.

  He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t called to tell Ria he was on his way. He kept coming up with flimsy excuses, but the truth was he was scared.

  Terrified. That the time and distance had made it clear to Ria that she didn’t want him anymore. That she’d outgrown him. Moved on. That she’d be happier in life without him.

  The past month had been hard—physically and emotionally—and the thing that had kept him going was that he’d be able to return to Ria soon. But now that it was happening, now that he was on his way, he was ridiculously frightened that all his hopes and dreams were built on nothing but sand.

  So he hadn’t called her. And he’d stopped by the house first to check it out, put his stuff down, and clean up a little before he went to see her.

  Maybe he was just stalling. If she was going to break his heart, he wasn’t in a hurry for that to happen.

  He couldn’t help but wonder if he deserved to have his heart broken after the way he’d broken hers eight years ago.

  “You’re home!”

  The voice surprised him so much he dropped his bag on the living room floor. The house was mostly empty now, most of the furniture given or thrown away except the few pieces he’d decided to keep. He turned around to see Martha coming from the kitchen. “Hey there,” he said with a smile. “I didn’t expect you here.”

  “Well, you’re paying me through the end of the month, so I figured I’d keep working on cleaning the place up. Might make it easier for you to sell.”

  “Thank you,” he said, looking around. “It really looks great. Is that new paint?”

  “Yes. Fitz did it. He was doing the repairs you asked him to make, and he said it would only take a day or two to paint the main rooms but it would help a lot when you got to selling, so I said he could do it. I hope I didn’t overstep—”

  “No! Of course not. It looks great. You all did a fantastic job. Thank you so much.”

  “Well, I don’t much like taking money for nothing, and Fitz said you paid him way too much, so we figured we’d keep working. I think it’s probably ready to be put on the market now, if that’s still what you want to do.” Her lined face wasn’t smiling, but it was gentle.

  “Yes. Yes, I’m going to. It’s way too big for just me.”

  “True, but maybe it won’t be just you for long. Maybe you’ll be wanting to start a family soon.”

  Jacob blinked at that bland statement. “Oh. Um, yeah. I don’t know. Nothing’s been...”

  “You are planning to stay, aren’t you?” For the first time, Martha looked worried. “Please don’t say you’re about to take off again.”

  “No, no. I’m staying. No matter what happens, I’m staying. But I’m going to move into one of those apartments over the storefronts downtown. A smaller place will make much more sense for me. And if somewhere down the road, I end up... needing a bigger place... Anyway, that’s down the road. Maybe.”

  “You don’t think she’s gonna tell you no, do you, young man?” Martha wasn’t a smiler, but the corners of her mouth were just barely turned up.

  He swallowed hard, too stretched emotionally to hide his real feelings. “I honestly have no idea.”

  “Well, go find her, Jacob. Do it right now. See what she says. Don’t wait any longer.”

  “Oh. Well.” He shifted from foot to foot, still fighting that same rising fear of rejection. “I thought I might take a shower first.”

  “Then take a quick one and put on something halfway decent. While you do that, I’m going to make you a bouquet from those pink peonies out back. They’re blooming real good right now. Then get your butt over to the shop. That sweet girl has waited for you long enough.”

  SECOND CHANCE FLOWER Shop closed at four thirty on Fridays, and Ria was ready to go home long before the clock told her it was closing time. When Madeline texted and said she should just close up shop ten minutes early, it was like her friend had read her mind. And the text gave her enough incentive to do what she almost never did. Leave early.

  She was tired. Worried. Simmering with anxiety and hope and too many other feelings to sort out. And she felt like she was always waiting for a call from Jacob that wouldn’t come.

  She wanted to go home and hibernate for the evening with ice cream and Netflix.

  After closing everything up and turning off the lights, she went out through the front door, looking behind her to make sure the door was locked.

  When she straightened up and took a step forward on the sidewalk, she pulled to a sudden stop.

  Because right in front of her, standing a few feet away on the sidewalk, was Jacob. He wore tan trousers (slightly wrinkled) and a blue shirt that actually had a collar. His hair was combed and still slightly damp from a shower. He was holding a bouquet of peonies, the stems neatly wrapped with twine.

  There was a sheepish smile on his face, and the slanting look he gave her was hopeful but also nervous.

  He was nervous.

  She stared at him with her mouth open, unable to move or get a word out.

  “Hi,” he said, looking down and then up again.

  She tried to say hi back, but no sound came out.

  “I’m back.” He licked his lips and took a step closer to her. “My heart hasn’t changed. It’s never going to change. I still love you more than... anything. I want a life with you. Here. If that’s what you want too.”

  Ria had always assumed she was a fairly sensible person who would react appropriately, even in extreme circumstances. She was wrong. Dead wrong.

  She burst into tears.

  “Oh God,” Jacob mumbled, closing the distance between them and pulling her against his chest. “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to pressure you. If you don’t want me, or if you’re still not sure, then I’ll... I promise I’ll...”

  “No!” she wailed, way too loud. But she couldn’t stand the broken anxiety in his voice. “I want you too! I love you too!”

  Way, way, way, way too loud.

  Jacob was momentarily stunned. He didn’t move a muscle as he processed what she was saying. Then he finally let out a long, helpless groan and pulled her back into a hard hug. “Are you serious, sweetheart? You mean it?”

&
nbsp; “Yes, I mean it. I love you so much. I never stopped.”

  “And you think you can trust me?” He was mumbling the words against her ear. “Because I’ll understand if you want to take it slow. We don’t have to be... We can take it as slow as you want.”

  “I don’t need to take it slow. I know what I want. And I know now that you want it too. I love you. I trust you.” She pulled away from his now damp shirt so she could smile wetly up into his face. “I want everything with you.”

  His face contorted with emotion he couldn’t control. He was shaking as he kissed her, so it wasn’t the most coordinated of embraces. But it didn’t matter.

  It was perfect.

  When they pulled away, he offered her the bouquet of peonies, muttering dryly that Martha had picked them for him. As she accepted the flowers, she was suddenly conscious of a cheering from around them.

  She looked around blankly.

  The first thing she saw was Madeline and Skye across the street, grinning and clapping their hands. Belinda had come out of the office where she worked down the block, and she was shaking her head as if she were silently saying it was about time. Fitz was hanging out not far away, giving her a dorky thumbs-up. The laundromat ladies had filed out to watch the proceedings. And everyone in Anna’s had emptied out onto the sidewalk, not wanting to miss the show.

  That was where the applause was coming from.

  Ria looked back at Jacob, bewildered and unable to stop smiling.

  “This wasn’t my fault,” he said. “I promise. I never would have put this kind of pressure on you. But Martha knew, and I guess she...” He shrugged. “Are you mad?”

  Ria broke into helpless giggles and hugged him again, taking care not to crush her flowers. “No, I’m not mad. I’m too happy to be mad.” She extricated one hand and waved at the various people gathered to witness her big moment. “But can we maybe now go somewhere private?”