Speed Dating (Preston's Mill Book 2) Page 14

  “I’m so sorry,” she said in a mere whisper.

  Oh, God. This is what dying must feel like, he thought. Because she was truly killing him—ripping his heart out. “Bella—”

  She shook her head. “I can’t. I…I don’t know how to move on from this. I don’t know how to trust you.”

  “I didn’t mean to—”

  “But you did,” she corrected, her voice growing a little stronger and then followed by more gasps from the people around them. “I’m still having a hard time processing that you’ve been lying all this time. I’m so sorry.”

  Her tears fell in earnest now, and at any other time, he would have felt free to reach out and wipe them away. But he couldn’t now. He didn’t have that right.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said one more time. “You need to go. Please.”

  There was one thing that he knew better than anything about Isabella—she didn’t like to be pushed, and he’d pushed her enough for right now. Probably enough forever. It was over. They were over.

  Jace couldn’t speak, couldn’t form a word even if he tried. With a curt nod, he turned and walked out of the salon.

  And out of Isabella’s life.

  ***

  It was dark in his apartment, and Jace had to wonder when it had happened. He’d been home for hours and just sitting on his couch. Beau was gone and he was alone.

  Something he had to get used to.

  For the life of him, he couldn’t remember driving home from the salon, but obviously he had. And now it was dark and lonely and pretty much how he viewed the rest of his life.

  A knock on the door had him jumping up and foolishly believing it was Isabella. He nearly tripped over his own eet on his way to ripping the door open.

  “Hey, man.”

  It was Chris.

  Jace sagged against the door. “Oh, hey. What’s up?”

  “Heather was at the salon earlier, and she told me what happened. You okay?”

  Jace motioned for Chris to come in. He flipped on the light switch to try and illuminate the place at least a little. When he shut the door and turn around, Chris was standing in the middle of the living room.

  “Seriously, are you all right?” Chris asked.

  All Jace could do was shake his head.

  “She probably just needs a little time. I know when Heather and I first started, it was hard for her to accept that I really had feelings for her—that I really cared and had changed.”

  Jace sat down on the couch and sighed. “Bella and I have known each other for so long, and she knows me, man. She… she knows me. I don’t know why I didn’t say something sooner. I should have. I freaking should have.”

  Chris sat down beside him. “Hindsight is always twenty-twenty.” He paused. “You know you mean too much to her for the two of you to just… not see each other anymore, right? It’s not possible.”

  “I’m tired of just seeing each other. I want more. I thought we were heading that way. And you know, I thought she was starting to feel more for me too. I had it all right within my reach and I blew it.”

  But Chris shook his head. “You didn’t blow it. You’ve just… given her a lot to think about. If you’d blown it, she would have fought you today in the salon. But she didn’t. She cried, Jace. And I’m not saying that to make you feel bad, but so you can see that there’s hope.”

  Jace looked at Chris with disbelief. “Hope? You think making Bella cry gives me hope?”

  A slow smile spread across Chris’ face. “It should.”

  “Okay, I’ll bite. Why?”

  “She’s crying because she cares, Jace. She’s hurt and she’s confused, but deep down she still cares. And she doesn’t want to lose you.”

  “That’s not the impression I got.”

  “You’re not seeing what the rest of us are seeing,” Chris countered. “Trust me. Give her a little more time.”

  “But what if… what if all she wants is to go back to being friends? I can’t do that anymore. Not after knowing—”

  “Yeah, I know. Believe me, I know. You’ve been patient all this time. Give her a little more of it. And then, take it slow. Call her. Or text her. Maybe the two of you just need to ease back into things.”

  Maybe Chris was right, but it didn’t make Jace feel any better. Right now, he felt like his whole life was over. His chest ached, and it was like all of the light and color was gone from his world.

  Hell, right now he wouldn’t even mind having Beau back. At least there’d be someone to talk to after Chris left.

  “If you need anything,” Chris went on, “I’m not far away. I’m serious—if you need to talk or want to go and grab a beer, just give me a call, okay?”

  “Thanks.”

  Fifteen

  Isabella stared at herself in the bathroom mirror in the salon, telling herself she’d made a huge mistake.

  She had.

  She couldn’t get over how broken Jace had looked when she’d rejected him earlier that afternoon.

  She shouldn’t have done that.

  No matter how hurt she still was about his hiding his feelings from her for so long, she never should have hurt him like that.

  She’d always been so close to him that hurting him felt like a gaping wound in her own chest.

  Releasing a shuddering breath, she glanced at her watch and straightened up at the time. Her last appointment of the day would be here soon. She needed to get out of the bathroom and face the world again.

  She washed and dried her hands, although she hadn’t actually used the bathroom, and then she made herself open the door and walk back to the front of the shop, where she saw Mrs. Pendergast was just arriving.

  When the old woman saw her, she gave a warm smile. “Hello, dear. Thank you for fitting me in this late.”

  “Oh, it was no problem. How did your doctor’s appointment go this morning?”

  The next half hour was taken up with washing and rolling the woman’s hair while hearing about the details of her appointment that morning. Isabella managed to smile and nod and make appropriate comments, but she was secretly praying that the hour would end soon so she could finally go home and have a good cry.

  She was able to get away briefly as Mrs. Pendergast was sitting under the dryer, and when she returned the old woman was just hanging up her phone.

  Elise had been working on a client’s cut in the chair next to hers, but she glanced at Isabella as she walked back into the main room. Her rueful expression made it clear that something Isabella didn’t want to happen was about to happen.

  Mrs. Pendergast announced from under the dryer, “I just spoke with Gladys Hanes. Why didn’t you tell me that young man declared himself this afternoon?”

  Isabella’s mood was so low she didn’t think it could sink any further, but now it did. Gladys had been getting her nails done today when Jace had come in earlier.

  “I’m sorry?” Isabella said, stalling as she walked over and raised the dryer, pretending to check whether Mrs. Pendergast’s hair was appropriately dried.

  It was, of course, and she had to fight the temptation to lower the dryer again over the woman’s head and turn the heat up to high to drown out the conversation that was about to occur.

  She resisted the temptation and switched off the dryer.

  “That young man you’re always attached to. He declared himself at last, didn’t he?” Mrs. Pendergast got up and walked back over to Isabella’s station.

  Declared himself. That was one way to put it.

  Isabella nodded and made a wordless affirmative sound, starting to unroll Mrs. Pendergast’s hair. She didn’t meet the other woman’s eyes.

  “So why aren’t you riding off into the sunset with him right now?”

  Isabella sighed and searched for something safe and yet still polite to say.

  “Now Mrs. Pendergast,” Elise said, shaking her head teasingly but obviously coming to the rescue. “We should try to give Isabella a little space.”

&n
bsp; “Why does she need space? Don’t you care for the young man?”

  “Of course I do,” Isabella admitted. “But it’s complicated.”

  “What’s complicated? He’s a good man and an excellent prospect. Why should it be complicated?”

  “It’s… it’s hard… to trust in a relationship that isn’t what he always pretended it was.” Had she not been so drained emotionally, she never would have admitted something so private.

  “What did he pretend it was?” Mrs. Pendergast demanded.

  “Friendship.”

  “Not to interfere, since it’s not really my business,” Elise said, obviously speaking carefully so she wouldn’t hurt or offend Isabella, “but aren’t good romances based on friendship?”

  “Maybe. Maybe. But—”

  “He lied to you?” Mrs. Pendergast asked, narrowing her eyes as she studied Isabella’s face in the mirror.

  Isabella gave a little shrug. “He hid the truth from me.”

  “I see.” Clearly thinking hard, the old woman evidently came to some sort of mental conclusion because her expression changed dramatically. “Then you were right to reject him. A liar is always going to lie, after all.”

  “Well, he didn’t really lie,” Isabella said, immediately jumping to Jace’s defense.

  “Didn’t he? How often did he speak and act like he only wanted friendship from you?”

  “I don’t know. A lot.”

  “And how long did it go on?”

  “Years,” she admitted, dropping her eyes. “Since high school, I guess.”

  “Then there you have it. He’s a liar who has been lying to you for years.”

  “He didn’t think he could tell me. He didn’t want to jeopardize our friendship. I can… I can understand that.”

  “Can you? Because I can’t. A liar lies to take the easy way out, and that’s what he did all this time.”

  “Maybe, but you should have seen him this afternoon. He put it all on the line. Risked everything. The whole town is going to know.”

  “The whole town probably already knows,” Mrs. Pendergast said in a no-nonsense voice, “but that doesn’t change the fact of him being a liar. You think he’s going to change now? What else is he going to lie to you about?”

  “He’s never lied to me about anything else. And now the truth is out in the open. I can understand why he did what he did. I don’t like it, but I can… can… under…”

  She trailed off as she caught the expression on Mrs. Pendergast’s face. Pleased. Victorious.

  She’d done this whole thing on purpose—gotten Isabella to admit to herself that she could understand and sympathize with Jace’s position.

  Elise slanted her a little smile. “It sounds like you might have already forgiven him.”

  Isabella took a shaky breath. “Maybe. Maybe. I just don’t know what to do.”

  “Maybe you should talk to him,” Elise suggested.

  “Yeah. Yeah. I guess I should. I just don’t know what to tell him. My head is still spinning from everything. How am I supposed to figure it out?”

  “Before I accepted Mr. Pendergast’s proposal, I made sure he was the only man in the world I wanted to spend my life with.”

  “How did you do that?” Isabella asked, genuinely interested. Despite the old woman’s meddling, she was clearly trying to help.

  “I considered all of the other possibilities, and that confirmed to me that no other man was at all acceptable to me.”

  Isabella drew her brows together. “How am I supposed to do that?”

  “Oh, I know!” Elise explained. “I’m going to one of those speed dating things in Chester tonight. I’m trying to get back in the saddle after the divorce. You should come with me.”

  Isabella squeaked. “I don’t want to do another speed dating thing! The last one was absolutely miserable.”

  “But how perfect would it be. It would be a shortcut to really seeing if there is any other man who has a chance to win your heart. It might help you really decide about Jace.”

  Isabella sighed. “But…”

  “You should definitely do that,” Mrs. Pendergast confirmed. “It’s an excellent idea.”

  “Or you could go talk to Jace without really knowing how you feel. Do you want to do that to him?”

  “No. I don’t. Okay. I’ll do it.”

  ***

  Four hours later, she was walking into a crowded room that was set up with small tables for the speed dating rounds.

  She had no idea what she was doing here. She really wanted to go back to Preston and hang out with Jace.

  Her sisters had all come over earlier to help her get dressed and talk through the Jace situation. They’d all seemed to think the speed dating was an excellent idea—a chance for her to sort through her feelings.

  It felt wrong. Ridiculous. Isabella shouldn’t be here, sizing up all these men for potential dates.

  Poor Jace was probably sitting all alone at home with a broken heart.

  And Isabella had done it to him.

  The idea of that was so painful that she couldn’t stand it. As she was standing with Elise, waiting for the event to begin, she pulled out her phone and texted Jace.

  Are you ok?

  His reply came almost immediately. Yes. What about you?

  I’m ok too. Are you sure you’re ok?

  I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.

  It was such a Jace kind of response that her throat tightened. She was about to text again, but Elise was pulling her over to a seat at her assigned table and pushing her into it.

  Isabella exhaled deeply as an announcer gave them directions and the event began.

  The first man who came to her table wasn’t bad looking—balding but intelligent-looking. They made small talk about jobs and families for a few minutes, and Isabella didn’t give him her card at the end of the conversation.

  He seemed like a decent enough guy.

  But he wasn’t Jace.

  In the time it took to shuffle tables, she texted quickly to Jace. I’m sorry about this afternoon.

  Don’t be. I was wrong. Not you.

  In the middle of her response to his, the next man came to the table. He was attractive in a beefy way she didn’t like, and he was also way too full of herself. She went through the motions of a conversation until their time was finally up.

  In the next transition time, she finished her text to Jace. I understand why you never said anything.

  And I understand why you’re so hurt. It’s my fault. Not yours.

  She stared down at the words, wondering if there had ever been another man like Jace in the whole world.

  The third man who came to her station was skinny and greasy and very awkward. Out of basic politeness, she managed through their entire allotted time, but she was immensely relieved to see him go.

  As soon as she could, she replied to Jace’s last message. We should talk I guess.

  Any time. Whenever you’re ready.

  He was so sweet. And so sensitive. And so smart and understanding. He had such a warm heart. He was always so good to her.

  No one had ever been so good to her.

  Her next session passed in a blur. She couldn’t remember anything about the man she talked to. Only that, when it was finally over, she could text back to Jace. Can I come over tonight?

  Of course!

  I’m stuck here for the moment but I’ll come as soon as I can.

  Her heart was racing, and she was breathing quickly as she went through the motions of three more sessions with men.

  The event wasn’t quite over when she finally couldn’t take it anymore. She had to see Jace. Now.

  She got up and was heading out the door during the next transition when Elise followed her, grabbing her arm. “Where are you going?”

  “I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want any of these men. I want Jace.”

  Elise’s face softened. “I know you do. But there’s only two more sessions. You’ll
leave those poor guys hanging. Finish this up, and then you can go see him.”

  She shouldn’t really worry about strangers she’d never met being left hanging, but she did. She’d always had a soft heart. So she relented and returned to her seat, where her next man was already waiting.

  He was a bore who spent the whole time talking about gaming and comic books.

  One more man now.

  She just had to talk to one more man.

  Then she could go be with Jace.

  Maybe for the rest of her life.

  She waited for her last man to appear, and was surprised when all the other guys were seated and he still hadn’t appeared.

  Maybe she was the one being left hanging—after she’d tried to be so nice.

  Typical.

  She was about to get up and leave when a man walked over and sat down across from her.

  She stared, her mouth falling open.

  Jace.

  It was Jace.

  Sitting right there across the table from her.

  “What are you doing here?” she finally managed to ask.

  He gave her a sheepish smile. “I… uh, well, they arranged it.”

  “They?”

  “Everyone. Your sisters. Elise. Even old Mrs. Pendergast called me. Let me tell you, that was a disturbing conversation.”

  It took a moment, but the words finally sank in. As did the slight ironic twitch of Jace’s mouth.

  Isabella burst into laughter. “You’re kidding!”

  “No. I’m not. They said you… you were confused, but I needed to be available.”

  “And you weren’t doing anything else tonight?”

  He snorted. “Erin brought Beau back to keep me company. She said I needed the companionship more than she did. So I was sitting there talking to Beau. But everyone said they were sure you’d want to see me tonight.”

  “I do,” she admitted, laughter now mixing with a deeper emotion, causing her eyes to burn. “I do, Jace. I’m so glad you’re here.”

  “I’m glad too. I wouldn’t have shown up here at this table, but it sounded like from your texts you were ready to talk.”

  “I am ready. I want to talk. I want to…” Her voice caught, and she had to swallow before she continued, “I want to do everything.”

  He met her eyes, hope springing to life there, even as she watched. “Do you really?”